Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Need some advice
My friend is dating the wrong person. He is addicted to porn. I am SURE he isn't faithful. He hates his family. He doesn't want anything to do with the church but my friend says she wants to get married in the temple. She says that he makes her happy, but every time they talk they either fight, or just sit there. She treats her family so poorly whenever he is around or even on the phone. I think she feels obligated to him because he proposed and she said yes. He is all wrong for her. I don't know how to help her get rid of him. Any ideas?
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5 comments:
I dated a guy like that. I felt the same way. With me I didn't listen to anyone. I knew that everyone was right. But It was so hard because you don't want to be alone. You are scared you will be alone forever. So you stick with him. The lord was the one that told me to get rid of him. I was praying one night and knew that he was not the one for me. It was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. But I would think that the only way for her to listen or to know is to turn to the lord. Tell her to pray and really ponder about him. Tell her to make a list of the kind of guy she wants for her and for her future kids. let me know how it goes.
Sounds like a section of my life. It's scary to think of being alone again, so you'd rather be miserable with someone than all alone. I agree with the praying. It's the only way. I think maybe you should pray for her to. Tell her to have an open mind and an open heart and listen to the spirit, not for what she wants to hear, but the truth. Hope it helps.
I just talked to my sister about this she was in the exact same situation, except being engaged. She said that she finally got out of it when she decided to read some articles about porn and the effects of it and what it eventually leads to... such as abuse and other nasty things. It takes years and a lot of counseling to get them away from it! Not only that put her bishop said that 99% of the time if they do get away, they will sometime revert to it again! Which I didn't know. It is VERY nasty and they have to have a STRONG desire, themselves, to stop the addiction! If you can talk her into looking at some articles and maybe convince her to go to her bishop for advice. But ultimately she has to decided what she wants. Its soooo hard! Keep talking to her about it, have her pray and fast about it. Even though they are engaged that doesn't mean that she can't back out! Keep talking to her about it, don't let up, if she commits to that relationship, if they already fight, she will never be happy with him. Maybe if you get her to stay away and think about it for two weeks, she will maybe be able to see that she will be ok with out him and that she really isn't happy! Hopefully that helps, I hope she sees the light! Let me know how it turns out!
wow- thats hard! i honestly don't know what to say--- But maybe just come out and talk to her have her read articles, pray about it and talk to her bishop about it!
You know it just occured to me that the person who we were talking about earlier today might assume its me you're talking about LOL
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